i don't do this often, only when i see a writing prompt that interests me, and this one hits very close to home so here goes.
what nervous habits do i have? i wouldn't call this a habit but more like a manifestation. one that i hate with a passion, and has made me very shy and afraid of public speaking. i have a speech impediment. when i get nervous (hysterical, pissed off) i may tend to stutter severly. which is why i think that me going up on stage to perform is an amazing feat i should never take lightly.
my mother said she did not notice my stuttering until i moved to canada at the age of 6. my life turned around drastically after that. i always had friends, and boyfriends and was always popular, but i was teased without mercy being called 'porky pig', (my family still makes fun of me) i used to pray and ask God 'to make me really pretty when i grew up, so no one would care what i sounded like'.
i had speech therapy for 2 years which helped but not really.
as i got older i learned how to control it. now most people can't even tell that i have a speech impediment, i talk very carefully and i have to think about what i need to say before i say it. which is why i find soo much freedom in writing, it literally sets me free from my constraints and betrayels of my speech. once i get comfortable with someone, it becomes more prominant, and to my surprise the men i date actually find it cute, which completely baffles me and makes me wanna gag, because i hate it with an unbelievable passion.
i am afraid for my children, hearing me stutter and thinking it's normal. it's a hard thing to live with, and it does a number on your self esteem, yeah i can hide it well, but i cringe alot inside when i talk. i'm shy, yet very outgoing, i smile alot, laugh alot, and i'm hella of a flirt, but not a moment goes by in which i think about not saying words with s', r's, and w's.
next time you want to make fun of someone who stutters. don't.
p.s. no i don't stutter during sex....LOL