one minute writer: nervous habits.

>> 11.03.2009

i don't do this often, only when i see a writing prompt that interests me, and this one hits very close to home so here goes.

what nervous habits do i have? i wouldn't call this a habit but more like a manifestation. one that i hate with a passion, and has made me very shy and afraid of public speaking. i have a speech impediment. when i get nervous (hysterical, pissed off) i may tend to stutter severly. which is why i think that me going up on stage to perform is an amazing feat i should never take lightly.

my mother said she did not notice my stuttering until i moved to canada at the age of 6. my life turned around drastically after that. i always had friends, and boyfriends and was always popular, but i was teased without mercy being called 'porky pig', (my family still makes fun of me) i used to pray and ask God 'to make me really pretty when i grew up, so no one would care what i sounded like'.

i had speech therapy for 2 years which helped but not really.

as i got older i learned how to control it. now most people can't even tell that i have a speech impediment, i talk very carefully and i have to think about what i need to say before i say it. which is why i find soo much freedom in writing, it literally sets me free from my constraints and betrayels of my speech. once i get comfortable with someone, it becomes more prominant, and to my surprise the men i date actually find it cute, which completely baffles me and makes me wanna gag, because i hate it with an unbelievable passion.

i am afraid for my children, hearing me stutter and thinking it's normal. it's a hard thing to live with, and it does a number on your self esteem, yeah i can hide it well, but i cringe alot inside when i talk. i'm shy, yet very outgoing, i smile alot, laugh alot, and i'm hella of a flirt, but not a moment goes by in which i think about not saying words with s', r's, and w's.

next time you want to make fun of someone who stutters. don't.


p.s. no i don't stutter during sex....LOL


Da_Kween November 3, 2009 at 1:15 PM  

My grandmother stutters...and by genial default, 2 of my male cousins also stutter. I've laughed at my little cousin b/c I think HE thinks it's funny. (we're a weirdo tribe) but, I've been known to catch a BIG attitude for anyone making fun of any of them.

James Earl Jones said he had one, too and that acting helped him remedy his issues with speech.

Cool post...what a way to open up. I'm proud of you.

Eddie November 3, 2009 at 2:12 PM  

oh man Im surprised! One would never have guessed after seeing the vids of you up on stage like that. I am glad that you've managed to get some control over it though :-)

oh and LMAO to your "P.s" :-P

Anonymous,  November 3, 2009 at 2:58 PM  

I'm here because I read your comment on ecstacees blog about swallowing. I like the man to taste me and him at the same time too. The need some of their own cum back so they can respect what they like us to do.

Secretia (Secret Story Time)

:::the.kisser::: November 3, 2009 at 3:51 PM  

@ da_kween thanx for the thumbs up. i don't normally like to talk about it cause once i do, it becomes more noticable. my father stutters and my younger bro does too (slightly).

@ eddie i know. i'm always afraid though that i'll get 'exposed' on stage which is why i normally use the band as back up. it helps with the flo more.

@secretia welcome! thanx for comming by. i agree with you. i would get insulted if a man didn't kiss me after i sucked him off, i'm sure he would get insulted if after he ate me out i tell "go rinse that".
i don't really swallow anymore cause the cum gives me massive stomach aches. but if he's worth it, i'll bear the pain ;)

Journey November 4, 2009 at 1:32 AM  

my boy stutters, actually two of em do. Nothing to it.

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