nablopomo: the dream kinda failed on this one

The Dream Feat Fabolous - Shawty Is A Ten Remix
by PeteRock

some signs you are not a 10

... if you wear leggings as pants. leggings were not meant to be worn as pants, no one looks cute with camel toe, even in a pair of killer heels. fashion etiquette states that while wearing leggings one's shirt/blouse etc.. must be covering the ass. even if you don't subscribe to fashion etiquette, look in the mirror.

... if you are a dutty chick. we are all asking you to bathe, wash your hair, comb your hair, clean your room, bathroom etc... you can't play clean forever, eventually the dirt will shine through.

... if you are a loud ass brawling chick. there is a difference between being loud and outgoing, having fun with your peeps (like my loud ass), and being the one who feels everyone needs a cussin', or that your phone convo is sooo amazing the whole building needs to hear it. you are not cute.

... if you insist on wearing and carrying the latest name brand everything, but your ass is catching the bus. the money you spend on the brands you can save up and buy a car. this however cannot be said about those who live in big cities which do not require you to drive, hence the second part...

... if you insist on wearing and carrying the latest name brand everything, but your ass is still living at home. the money you spend on the brands you can save up and live on your own, this can be said anywhere.

... if your pussy is a sample. sexually liberated is cute, very sexy, however screwing any guy who breathes your air is not. your pussy is not a sample, it's important to the survival of the human race, treat it as such.

... if you wear heels you are unable to walk in. please stop it. and wear your size. if your pretty little ankles cannot support the shoes, don't wear it, because men and women will laugh at you, some will point. okay okay.... i will point.

... if your weave looks like crap. enough said.

... if you carry around negative energy everywhere you go. please go away. that shit is contagious, and no one wants to be around you and those who do are exactly like you. misery likes company, but very few people like misery, because she's not cute.

... if your so desperate to be liked that you'll kiss everyone's ass and throw honesty to dogs. be yourself, and everyone will see it, and appreciate it. insincereity is obvious and it will throw you under the bus everytime.

.kisses.

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nablopomo: just me (and my hair)

a little over 3 years ago, i made one of the biggest decisions in my life. it was one of those big ones that required thought, and tears, and maybe i shouldn'ts, it was definitely not one of my just do it! moments.

yup... i went natural.

i traded in the all day outings at the hair dresser, the relaxers, the burned scalp, the security and the cute flipped hairstyles for my natural texture. my curls, my fear, my confidence and my heightened sexuality. i must admit there are days when i look at my hair pulled into a cheek bone revealing puff and i think to myself 'i miss my straight hair'. i stare at my face, the face which puzzles so many people "where are you from?", and i remind myself that i am not my hair,

but i am.... well kind of....

in a way i have become my hair. natural, without lies, complex (who am i kidding, i was always complex), attention grabbing (who am i kidding there too?). i just love walking into a spot and being one of the only women rocking her hair. and i do mean rocking, because it is fabulous, i am fabulous and fabulosity can't just be worn...like wtf? you gotta rock that shit! loud and proud! ( i just recently dyed the back half burgandy), and sexy as hell. " your a freak aren't you? " apparently being a poet and a natural woman equals down to earth, freak.. it was a triple whammy when i was a vegetarian.

i never realized how much men black, and white love natural hair, love to feel the texture, love to smell it even. a man seems to really appreciate the beauty of the unrulyness of my hair. as poetry guy says, and i quote "i wanna fuck her hard enough that her hair will get so nappy, i can't run my finger's through it"... yes baby, i'm sure.

don't get me wrong, it was hella hard. i am very high maintenace. not gold digger high maintenace, i just like to look good, so going from straight, always done, hair to hair i didn't know what to do with, was like me throwing myself in front of a slow moving train, and not being able to run, nowhere! but i've fallen in love with my hair, this is one time that i thank God for the diversity in my genes (so called 'good hair'), i can go from straight to curly anytime i want. i rock mohawks, fohawks, chiney bumps, french braids, twist outs, wash and go's, and the almighty puff! however i cannot rock an afro! (i don't have the texture for it...sigh). plus i have saved soo much money, it hurts my feelings knowing the trips, and shoes, and purses, and bills, i have spent on my hair. damn!

do i want to go back, no.... well sometimes, but even if i did, there are a dozen people who would kill me before i sat in the hair dressers chair. i made the choice to come over, not because i'm going back to africa, or because i'm joining the cause, but simply i wanted a change. and i'm making the choice to stay. i am not my hair, my hair is a manifestation of who i am. i am me.

teheehehee, plus i love to feel a strong firm hand with a firm hold on my coils jerking my head back to ask me 'do you like that'.

for all my napptural sistahs, or those wanting to do it check out this website, it's helped me and i hope it will help you.

http://www.motowngirl.com/

.kisses.

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down to earth highly maintained lady part 2

here we are again, back to being a highly maintained lady. this section of the list is dedicated to my gurl nat who is as insecure as they come, not sure why because she is very funny, and attractive, yet life and men have made her feel different about herself. so nat, (gurl you are the shit) this is for you.

first of all let me clarify why i am intent on referring to myself (and you) as a lady. a woman is just a girl who grew up into an adult, the world is full of women.... however the world is in a major shortage of ladies. many dictionaries describe a lady as : a well mannered and considerate woman with high standards of [proper] behaviour : that's what i believe in, once again not snobbism, because that makes you ugly, so let me describe a lady as this : a woman who is sure of herself before anyone else is, well mannered, well put together, the standard of beauty, knows what she wants, and how to get it, down to earth and highly maintained :

4::: i will always remember that i am the shit. there is no one else like me. no one else has the potential to be beautiful from the inside out like i do. i was born to live a life only i can live. that should give me comfort, but there are some days where i wake up looking like shit, and feeling like it too. should i give up, and allow my emotions to get the better of me, i could, but then my day will end up being shit. i believe that i control my day to an extent, and i with my words can determine my outcome. so when i wake up on those days, hair giving me problems, a pimple on my face, and my tummy looking a little bloated (lol), i look in the mirror, strike a a bad ass pose and tell myself "gurl you are the SHIT!"

having said that, no one can take that knowledge away from you. no man, no jealous women, no one. you are who you are, and you are who you are for a reason. too often we allow our circumstances, and our past experiences to bitch slap us in our face, and mind you not just once, but over and over and over again... when we finally emerge, our face is manipulated and full of bruises, shit, no wonder we can't be confident in who we are. no one else has the power to give us bruises unless we allow them to punch us.... over and over again.

5::: i will always remember that sexy is not in the clothes i wear but it's a mindset. ladies i am soo tired of women thinking that a tight ass pair of jeans (yeast infection worthy), a low top and high heels (they can't walk in) is what sexy is. ask any man and they will tell you that sexy is a mindset, not neccessarily an outfit. ask an self assured lady, and she will say the same thing.
now of course we as women have outfits in which we feel our sexiest, however if we don't come to the knowledge that we as ladies are sexy, the clothes will hold us hostage.

sexy is in how we walk, how we talk, our intelligence and yearning for more knowledge, our creativity, our compassion, our ability to take care of our significant other. our sexy is natural, something we are born with, and since when did you see someone born in a tight ass pair of jeans?

smooth always told me at the most random times (when i'm cotch on the bed, stomach full, and watching a movie) "you know you're sexy right"... poetry guy told me that when i am up there holding the mic, sharing my poetry "you are so sexy", not because of how i am dressed, but because i am confident and able to draw everyone into my space. ladies find your space, own your space, own your natural God-given sexy, and draw everyone into it.

6::: i will always dress to impress. stacy and clinton from tlc's 'what not to wear' have taught me something i will forever hold on to ' don't dress for where you are in life, dress for where you want to be '. once you come to the knowledge that you are the shit, once you own your God-given sexy, you will begin to look like it. ladies, let us step up the sexy, let us leave our houses in such a way that no one can mistake who we are. that doesn't mean a full face of make up (some may prefer that, but i really don't) heels and a pencil skirt at 10am, ( i am sexy in a pair of fav jeans, a fitted tee and wicked flats) it does mean however that we leave our homes looking like we know we are the shit.

::: pleaseeeeee let us comb our hair. this hits home for me especially because i wear my hair in it's natural texture, however that doesn'y give me the excuse to leave my home looking like i have no mother.

::: pleaseeeeee wear your size. OMG. wear your size. if you are a size 9, wear a size 9. keep in mind that size doesn't really matter, fit is everything. but what i'm trying to get at, is wear what fits you. if you are a size 9, you truly have no right squeezing your ass in a size 3, if you are a size 3, why the hell are you wearing a size 9? huh? why the bloody hell? also, not every trend that is thrust our way is for us. know your body, know your body shape, and what looks good on your body. shop around, and don't be afraid to put something down, because everyone else can't wait to scoop it up.

::: pleaseeeeee stop using your face as a coloring book. makeup should be worn to enhance your natural beauty, and to show forth your wicked and unique personality, not to make you look like a damn idiot.

ladies, please remember that we have no control over who we meet once we leave the non-judgemental confines of our homes. we could be bumping into a future boss, a future lover, a future client, sometimes more present than we think, and truss that people remember when you look like crap flung on a wall, people also remember and look up to you when you look like you own your life.

so ladies let us own our lives!

luv la.moi

:::to be continued:::

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down to earth highly maintained lady

ladies it is time for us to step up our game, to bring our sexy to another level, to show up and show the hell off. so in my attempt to raise my own bar, from this day on, i promise to be a down to earth highly maintained lady.

i am 26, and in the midst of finding myself, and oh what a wonderful journey it is. exposing myself to the world of spoken word, and exposing myself to art of socializing, i am doing just that, exposing myself. in the midst of my self discovery i have decided to cement who i am, or rather who i want to be. and i want to be a down to earth highly maintained lady. not neccessarily high maintenace, because that can tend to lead to snobbism, and no matter how pretty you are, once your attitude is ugly there is no hope. but we should be proud to take care of ourselves, and let other people see our fabulousity

i want to be the one who always seems like she has it together, because truthfully the world does not need to know i have crap going on in my life. so here is my list that will help me and my fellow ladies get there.

:::note::: most of the points on this list, i already follow but we are stepping up the sexy, and so i have decided to include them. these are also in no particular order.

1::: i will keep my hands and nails looking good at all time. there is nothing worse than meeting a beautiful woman for the first time and shaking her ugly, unkept hands. chipped nail polish (especially bright or dark colours), uneven and jagged nails, and hairy fingers are not attractive, and definitely can cause your sexy points to plummet. can you imagine me holding and stroaking the mic, sharing a poem about my man stroaking me, and in lust you feast your eyes on my unkept nails and hands. please say no. because i am. lotion, lotion, lotion. dry hands are a huge turn off, and something so small can really say a whole lot about you. lazy, uncommitted etc....

2::: i will keep my feet looking suckable and presentable at all times. yes i love to have my toes sucked, and my feet caressed and rubbed, and which man, wants to suck on feet that can scratch a hardwood floor. please don't tell me yours, because you know that is a lie. pedicures are our friends, and even if we cannot afford regular ones, we are more than capable of up keeping them when we get them. why live life always afraid to take off your shoes, dinner parties at your friends homes should be spent enjoying the night, not continually finding ways to hide your feet. and surprise visits should not have you scrambeling for a pair of socks. keep your feet looking presentable at all times, not only in the winter, because sexy knows no seasons.

3::: i will keep my body smooth. now body hair is a touchy subject, because there are some women who love their hairy armpits, and curly legs, i am not one of them. now i admit there are times when i will allow stubble to grow on my legs from sheer lazyness, but that has to stop. no, armpit hair is not cute, and it also allows the duttyness that is BO to dwell. for those who have significant others, your men do not want to know they may be able to cornrow and bead the hair on your body. please be maintained. if you prefer the coochie to be smooth, up keep that. and if you don't at least shave the area around the lips, because a mouth full of pussy hair is not a good look, nor a good taste or smell for that matter. please remember that hair traps odors. if you have facial hair, take care of it and keep taking care of it, no one will be able to see your potential through a mustache, beard, and ashanti side burns. eyebrows... keep those bad boys plucked, and threaded.

we are ladies for a reason, we are beautiful, we are talented, we are sexy. we are born sexy, we need to show that we are sexy. and how can we do that, by showing up and showing off why we are ladies. down to earth highly maintained ladies.

:::to be continued:::

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